SENSE & SENSITIVITY
Woman questions need to use labels in relationship
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been seeing this guy for 10 months now. We get along great, and I have completely fallen in love with him. I think he feels the same way about me, but we have yet to say the words “I love you” to each other.
He does not refer to me as his girlfriend, and I do not refer to him as my boyfriend. My friends and family think this is very abnormal because of how long we’ve been an item. What is your take on my situation? Is this a huge red flag? -- No-Status Relationship, Jackson, Mississippi
DEAR NO-STATUS RELATIONSHIP: Because you both are behaving the same way, this is not as odd as your loved ones think. Many young people address their relationships more casually than observers consider ideal. Determine how you feel about this man and what you want from the relationship. Do you love him? If you do, why not tell him?! He may be afraid to express his love for you openly. If you truly love him, it’s OK to be honest -- even if he doesn’t say it back to you. The fact will have been spoken.
Labeling your relationship is less important than how you treat each other. If you feel loved and respected consistently, that’s the key to a healthy relationship. Because people always want to know, you may decide to talk about it with him. “What should we call each other?” could be the question that launches a rich conversation.