Pen-pricks

• The White House summoned support for Venezuela’s opposition leader who is trying to unseat dictator Nicolas Maduro, who refuses to step down and has the army firmly on his side. Maduro opponents appear to be losing. Rarely is it good news when someone calls you from the trunk of a car.

• The Christian Science Monitor reported a Gallup Poll that said the 15 Southern states are the nation’s most religious area. It says 90 percent of Southerners consider religion important. In Texas you can literally feel the presence of Jesus all around you due mainly to poor border control.

• Democratic Senator Cory Booker announced he’s running for president at a rally in Newark on Friday. What’s one prospect more at this point? I predict the first Democratic debate will have so many presidential candidates, the debate stage will be so long it could double as the U.S. border wall.

• The Census Bureau cited the nation’s low fertility rate of Millennials in their 30s who are late getting married. Nowadays before young people get married they have to ask themselves one question. Is this the person I want to spend the rest of my life watching them look at their cellphone?

Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood and a speaker. His email address is argus@argushamilton.com.