OF BEAUTY, SELF-BELIEF, AGEING

HELLO H-Metro readers and beauty enthusiasts…

In this instalment, I will go into detail about accepting yourself and believing in your beauty before anything else.

I have noted that one has to believe in themselves before they try to convince others.

Basically, beauty starts from within.

I feel before I give you any tips I should highlight that if you accept yourself, beauty will have a true meaning.

BEAUTY AND AGE

When we are in our teen years, we’re figuring out who we really are, while going through awkward phases of zits, braces, and stringy hair.

This can leave many teens feeling insecure. When we’re in our 20s, we’re still exposed to the messages we were exposed to while in high school, of what is “beautiful” or what is trendy. We’re constantly seeing images of what we should look like on television or magazines or social media.

In our 30s and 40s, life gets busier and responsibilities grow.

Aging begins and bodies change, making it harder to look the same way we did when we were younger.

We all know that looks fade and, in the grand scheme of things, personality is infinitely more important than how you look.

Here are some tips on how to stop disliking your physical appearance and to start loving the way you look.

Focus on the parts of your body that you love

Maybe you don’t particularly like your nose, but you love your legs or you feel your chest is too small, but that you’ve got a great butt!

Embrace those parts of your body that you love and accept that none of us are perfect, even those who appear so on a magazine cover.

The very things that you believe are flaws can be the very things that someone else may love about you.

It can help to dress or groom yourself to accentuate those parts of your body that you love — not for anyone else, but for yourself.

It can do wonders for your self-esteem when you know you look good — to heck with everyone else if they judge you for what you wear, or if they don’t notice those parts that you think look great.

The only person who has to feel good about your body at the end of the day is you.

You can also dress up once in a while to remind yourself of how awesome your body truly is, then there’s no harm in that!

Remember to smile

It’s true — smiling lifts your mood. And when you smile, you lift the moods of those around you. Happiness is contagious. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to go around smiling all the time, but remind yourself to smile once in a while when you’re feeling down as it can lift your mood.

We all have days when the last thing we feel like doing is acting like Sally Sunshine. It’s equally important to honour the moments or days when you don’t feel like smiling. But remember to smile every once in a while as this can do wonders for your mood.

Put out the love that you want to feel

You may find that if you’re generous with your compliments to others, you may end up getting more compliments back than you expected.

Hearing nice things from others can improve your mood in the short-term and contribute to an overall sense that others recognise your beauty and your worth.

A study conducted in 2017 by researchers at China’s University of Electronic Science and Technology, found that women found men more attractive when they were complimented by them.

Specifically, men became more attractive when they used metaphorical or poetic compliments, as opposed to literal, straight-forward ones. Complimenting others may make you seem sexier to them, which will make you feel sexier by proxy.

Refrain from embracing negativity

The next time someone compliments you, instead of deflecting or downplaying their compliment, focus on receiving it honestly.

What if you let yourself hear it as though you really believed it too?

Similarly, self-deprecation around your friends or around potential partners can be a common defence mechanism if you have low self-esteem. It can feel safer to put yourself down before someone else has the chance to. Talking negatively to yourself contributes to a negative image of yourself.

It also opens the door for others to speak to you as negatively as you speak to yourself.

Experts recommend you identify what is triggering these comments when you say them.

Is it when you are around a particular person? In a particular place?

When you narrow down what is inspiring you to say these things, you can take action against this kind of behaviour.

Take stock of the people in your life

When you have a toxic relationship with someone, it can affect several aspects of your life.

This is especially true if that toxic relationship is with someone you live with. When you have to come home to someone who doesn’t help you feel and be your best, that can bleed over into other aspects of your life, from your social relationships to your professional ones.

Cutting out toxic people from your life can be invigorating. It can also be challenging to recognize toxic behaviour. You deserve to be around people who make you feel valued and loved.

Let yourself go

There are times you put the make-up away. Stash the “stylish clothes.”

Allow yourself just to be you. If you’re more comfortable in baggy jeans over skinny jeans, wear the baggy jeans. Fall in love with your make-up-less face.

You’ll find that you may come to love your natural look more when you don’t have to put so much work into your appearance every day.

All that maintenance may make you feel uncomfortable with your natural appearance.

The less work you put into “fixing” yourself on yourself, the more you may realise you don’t need much “fixing” in the first place.

You may also find that it improves your self-esteem more to focus on luxurious face masks, taking good care of your skin and hair, or finding ways to be creative in the way you dress.

Keep yourself healthy

The more you eat foods that nourish your body and the more you move in ways you like, the better you will feel.

Eating foods that are healthy for you, which is different for everyone, can help boost your immunity and clear your skin.

You may find that your body image improves as you focus more on taking care of it and what it can do for you. Exercise doesn’t have to mean hitting the gym five days a week, it can be a walk through your neighbourhood with a friend or a dance workout.

Getting your heart rate up releases those “happy chemicals” in your brain, like dopamine, that lift your mood.

Treat your body right, and it will treat you right.

 Accept aging for what it is Sometimes we see a celebrity that’s the same age as us, and start wondering how can she still have such a flat stomach, so few wrinkles, and her natural hair colour?

There are several ways celebrities “defy” aging. Celebrities often have curated the images you see of them, so you’re not really seeing their natural look.

Celebrities also have teams of stylists and makeup artists and trainers that help them be camera-ready.

Celebrities can also afford a lot of personal help to stay “healthy,” like fitness trainers, personal chefs, and nannies.

It’s important to remember that physical appearance is a part of a celebrity’s job, and that may not always be easy.

They may be have spa treatments, wax removals, intensive workouts, and other beauty regimens as part of their routines everyday.

Plus, they may feel pressured to spend money on all of the latest and greatest products and plastic surgery just to look young.

No one is immune to aging. You are worth more than the wrinkles you see.

By focusing on the things in life you have to celebrate thanks to your age, you can refocus on gratitude.

Your waistline may have changed thanks to the pregnancy that gave you great children.

Your face may have some wrinkles around your smile, but that’s thanks to all the laughs over the years and sun-kissed beach days.

CONCLUSION

Do you often struggle with your perception of your physical appearance?

With our tips we can help you find the beauty inside and outside of yourself once again.

Till we meet again next week, happy reading… NB: Joey Nyikadzino is a beautician, scriptwriter, hairstylist and entrepreneur based in the capital.

She also runs a film and theatre school grooming upcoming actresses from less fortunate backgrounds and remote areas.

For your feedback contact her on:

Facebook page: joey’s hairstyles and beauty products or Joey Tanae Nyikadzino

Email: Joeynyikadzino@gmail.com...tanaetjoewy@gmail.com

Mobile number: 0773222252/0719222252. Instagram:joewytanae