Soul mates

Send your to 0773111328 or 0772115830 or write to Sis Noe, Sunday News, Box 585, Bulawayo. You can also follow Sis Noe on http://sisnoe. blogspot.com

Dear readers Please note that Sis Noe is not a medical doctor but an elderly woman who has almost seen it all. She is a mother, grandmother, great-grandmother and aunt to many people. Those that require medical attention please visit the nearest clinic or hospital. Sis Noe is flattered by your confidence in her. Bombard her with social issues/problems — she will be of much help to you. I AM 32-year-old man who is gainfully employed looking for a woman aged 26 to 36 to date.

I am a man aged 29 looking for a lady who is aged between 20 and 24 who is serious and wants to get married.

I am Christian lady aged 22 looking for a Christian guy aged 25 to 32 who wants marriage and he must be negative with kids. I live in Bulawayo.

I am a single lady aged 36 looking for a relationship. I am HIV-negative and currently based in SA.

Ngingumama olemnyaka yokuzalwa engu28, ngilengane eziyi-2. Ngidinga umuntu oseqedile ngokwamandlwane ukuthi sincedisane empilweni, angabi positive.

I am a single lady looking for a guy to settle down with aged between 35 to 40 who is HIV-positive. I am based in Bulawayo.

I am a 28-year-old guy, looking for a single lady aged between 23-26 years old. Should have no kids and must be working.

I am a single mum of one aged 34. I want a single guy aged 37 and above with kids who is HIV-positive. I am based in Bulawayo.

Hello Sis Noe. I am a 39-year-old single mum of two looking for a professional man aged 41 to 50 who is willing to settle down and start a family. May have children or not. No married and attached men. They should be around Bulawayo.

I am a guy aged 30 who is HIV-positive, I am seeking a lady aged less than 29 of the same status.

I am 30-year-old married man who is sexually starved looking for a woman who is in the same predicament.

I am a guy aged 26 who is HIV-negative, looking for a woman of the same status aged 20 and above.

I am a businessman aged 50 with no kids. I am negative, looking for an Adventist woman aged 30 and above of same status.

I’m a 34-year-old lady who wishes to meet a man who stays in Bulawayo, working class and a Christian who’s 36 years old and above.

I am a man aged 31 and negative. I am looking for a serious lady aged 20-28 serious and ready to settle down.

I’m a lady aged 26, I have one child. I am looking for a guy aged 28 and above who is based in Bulawayo. Reply For the numbers of the above people send a WhatsApp text to the number 0773111328. Do not call because you will not get assisted; if you are going to text a SMS make sure it is accompanied with airtime.

I told my new boyfriend that I regret having sex in the past and I will only sleep with him when I am his wife. He told me I am a secondary virgin. What does that mean? Woried. Reply Secondary virginity is a decision to abstain from sexual activity until you get married. It’s an opportunity to start over. Your physical virginity may be lost, but virginity is more than just a physical state. It’s an attitude, a frame of mind. It’s manifested in the way you look at yourself and others. Secondary virginity is a time to change bad habits and heal past wounds. It allows you to clean and renew yourself prior to marriage. Secondary virginity is a return to abstinence following a life of sex. A commitment to secondary virginity is often made with the goal of remaining abstinent until committing to a life-long monogamous relationship, such as marriage. Increasing numbers of teens and young adults are making this decision to reduce their considerable risk for sexually transmitted infections and non-marital pregnancies.

Ever since I gave birth my husband rarely sleeps with me. Sometimes he comes to bed late and I think he will be avoiding me. What can I do? Reply I believe your husband is suffering from post-natal depression. The truth is depression, anxiety and other mood disorders are common. In fact, they are just as common — and just as real — as physical problems, like heart disease and diabetes. They can also be as crippling. You are having a hard time living with a husband who is depressed. The lack of sex is a very painful part of that. So how do you deal with it, and what can you do to give yourself a sense of acting on it, even though you know that you cannot cure it? If taking action is your instinct, then take action. You need to be there for him, talk to him, cook for him, and treat him as if everything is normal. Do not pressure him to have sex with you, it will happen in due time. Having patience is hard. Waiting for someone to improve is hard. But what choice do you have? The other ways to beat depression is to do things that reduce stress. Exercise, a talk with the marriage counsellor, a holiday getaway for a day without the baby — all these things can help you.

I have noticed that there is blood in my semen. I am worried. Please help me Sis Noe. Reply Blood in the semen is known as hematospermia. This condition is common, and in younger men, it’s not usually a sign of a serious problem. Hematospermia has many potential causes, the most common of which is inflammation of the seminal vesicles (the small glands that produce most of the fluid in semen). Other possible explanations may include inflammation or lesions in other parts of the reproductive system such as the prostate, urethra and testicles. Hematospermia will usually disappear without medication, but it’s a good idea to get checked. It’s important to get examined if you keep noticing blood for more than ten ejaculations or two months, or if you are over 40 years of age. These factors might indicate a more serious cause like a systemic infection or, for older men, cancer.

I am a boy aged 15 and every morning I wake up with an erection. My friends think it’s caused by urine but it happens even when I don’t have urine in my bladder. Reply There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. And contrary to what many believe, waking up with your penis at attention is not caused by urine build-up in the bladder. Morning erections are technically night time erections (or Nocturnal Penile Tumescence). They happen three to five times per night. They usually occur during periods of Rapid Eye Movement (REM) sleep (when most dreaming occurs) and last around 30 minutes each. Unrelated to dream content, they are both common and completely normal. Though you may find it surprising, this phenomenon occurs in other mammals. Women experience similar yet less visually noticeable REM-related engorgement of the clitoris and vagina as well. Thought to be the body’s natural attempt to properly oxygenate the penile tissue, most guys will have nocturnal erections throughout their lifetime, and their frequency, along with one’s awareness of them, may vary.

I recently went for an HIV test and I tested positive. But I am afraid to tell my girlfriend. How best can I tell her? Worried. Reply Breaking the news to your partner that you may have HIV can be very daunting. There are many ways to broach the topic, and many factors to consider including timing, location, and the manner in which you communicate most comfortably. Often it’s helpful to pick a time and place where you and your partner will both be calm. Be prepared for your partner to be upset, sad, overwhelmed, and/or unable to have a prolonged discussion right away. People often need time to process the news that a loved one has HIV. After the news has time to settle, you and your partner may wish to discuss a range of issues, such as the risks of transmission, safer sex strategies, how this impacts your day-to-day life, whether you will begin treatment, and how you can best support each other. You certainly don’t have to tell everyone in your life that you have HIV, but it is actually required by law that you disclose your HIV status to anyone you could potentially transmit the virus to. You may also wish to consider the nature of your relationship — do you and your partner have sex that would be considered high risk for transmitting HIV (sex without protection)? Is there any chance you would be putting yourself in danger by telling your partner? For a host of reasons, and despite legal considerations, some people living with HIV choose not to tell their sexual partner/s about their status. It may be best to speak with an HIV test counsellor about your relationship and how best to manage the news of having HIV. Telling your partner you have HIV probably won’t be as easy as the other things you might discuss in your relationship, but letting her know your HIV status could enable her to make well-informed decisions about her own health and safety.