Endometriosis and relationships

HELLO once again readers. I hope you enjoyed your Valentine’s Day and celebrated the love with your loved ones. This week I will be touching on Endo and relationships. Endometriosis affects relationships in a colossal way. Often loved ones don’t really understand what a woman is going through or simply get tired of hearing about pain. Hopefully, this article can break the ice in your various relationships.

Your family are usually the first people who get affected by your condition. Sometimes they struggle to understand what you are going through. How can you make them understand better? Education is key. Educate your family about endometriosis. Print information for them and be patient with them.

Because endometriosis is quite unknown by a lot of people, most of your family members probably won’t know what it is. I am extremely blessed to have family members who love and support me with this condition but I have also had some who called me lazy, attention seeking and ignored my pain. That is okay.

Ignore them, they really don’t know better. Focus on the ones that are willing to learn and know that it’s not only about you, but about you as a family.

Our African culture emphasises that a true woman must cook, clean, be active and that “pain is normal”. It is not. PAIN IS NOT NORMAL.

Family may have nasty things to say or even call you “cursed” but you must understand that 176 million women have endometriosis. You are not alone. Friends, Schoolmates and Co-workers The people who you interact with daily also need to understand what you are going through as they are people you spend a lot of time with.

I suffered a lot of bullying at school due to my condition and it really affected me and my spirit. However, now that I am older I realise the girls also did not know better. Had I known then what I was suffering from I would have again educated my peers.

You need to be unapologetic about your condition. People really treat you the way you allow them to. Stand up for yourself. Let your boss, your teachers and friends know about your condition so that when you need to miss school or work, there is not much of a spectacle.

Be honest with yourself about the amount of work you can take because your health comes first.

Relationships with friends may wear thin because you may not be able to go out as much or do things at the pace that they are.

I know all too well about this. It hurts when friends move on without you and don’t invite you to things. Try and become friends with ladies who have endometriosis because you will get each other.

Most of all cherish the people who have genuinely stuck by you. Those are people to keep in life.

This is one of the most complex relationships a woman has when she has endometriosis. It is scary to think of having a relationship with someone when you have a chronic condition.

A woman ponders on whether she is good enough or if a man will stay with her. Issues about infertility also come up.

Endometriosis can make sexual intercourse painful which may also strain a relationship. It is simple.

A man who truly loves you will stand by you. It will not be “your” problem but an “our” problem. Of course it will not be easy but your partner should “see you” and not the illness.

He will see your heart, your strength and not your faults. This is not me just talking. I am blessed to have a helpful and understanding partner. He has had to learn about endo and continues to learn about it. Most of all you must know that you deserve love despite the illness and, it will come.

In conclusion, the key to endometriosis and relationships is EDUCATION. You need to be well educated on the subject in order to educate those around you. There is also a brilliant film about endometriosis called EndoWhat.

For further information you can contact me on +263778026402. I am here for you.