Putting her BEST FOOT FORWARD
The Diabetic’s Girlfriend, Ashley Hanger, is on track to fundraise $10k for Diabetes Australia while she starts a new platform for people with diabetes
For the first two years, I think I was really ignorant to how diabetes affects Tristan’s life,” says 26-yearold Ash, whose partner of fouryears has type 1. “He’s very happy-go-lucky, and doesn’t talk about it if he’s had a bad night sleep, or if he’s feeling drained. But because he never made it seem like a big deal, I mirrored his attitude, without really understanding what he was going through.” Although there were moments when Tristan, 29, would ask Ash to grab him a Coke when he felt his sugars drop, she’d only ever had passing interactions with people with diabetes, so she didn’t know what living with diabetes meant.
However, when they moved in together in 2019, the mirror was shattered. “We woke up one morning, and Tristan wasn’t getting out of bed,” she recalls. “I thought he was just tired, so I left him to sleep while I got ready for work. When he finally got out of bed, he was doing bizarre things - like opening doors and cupboards, walking in circles, and speaking in incoherent sentences - and then he couldn’t even hold himself up.
“Initially, I thought he was kidding around - if you knew us, you’d understand - but it dawned on me pretty quickly that something was very, very wrong... and I had no idea how to fix it.
“Back then, I didn’t know the difference between a low or a high, or how to treat either one; but in my head giving him a soft drink was the easiest thing I could do, so I gave him a Lucozade and hoped for the best.
“As soon as he came-to, I just burst into tears. I was so overwhelmed and scared. I couldn’t believe this was what diabetes was like, and I had been so unaware all those years.”
This led Ash to dive head-first into learning everything she could about diabetes. “The way I see it,
when I have a bad day at work, Tristan does everything in his power to turn the day around - whether that’s making dinner, or buying me flowers,” she says. “So, when diabetes is being a little gremlin, why shouldn’t I do everything I can to take some of that weight from Tristan’s shoulders too?”
This led Ash to seek a space to unload her worries and fears away from Tristan. “I never wanted him to think diabetes was a burden – it hasn’t ever been, not once.” However, she struggled to find someone who shared her experiences of living with someone with diabetes. So Ash created her own blog and Instagram as ‘The Diabetic’s Girlfriend’. “It feels selfish to say, but supporting someone with a chronic illness puts a great deal of responsibility on your shoulders,” she says. “Sometimes it feels like it’s your duty to keep someone alive. When you’re living with a diabetic, you’re their safety net, the final frontier. And then there’s the feelings of guilt, because you’re someone who’s perfectly healthy, and you’re not able to take away the pain diabetes sometimes causes.”
Since sharing her journey, Ash has been overwhelmed with the number of people who also love someone with diabetes and as a result has created a community for all. “I get messages every week from people who finally feel validated in the guilt they’re feeling too, and are reassured that the anxiety will lighten with time, as we all try to better understand diabetes together.”
With this support, in October 2020, Ash decided to begin fundraising $10,000 in 10 months for Diabetes Australia through Adventure All Stars. “It’s a way for me to make a difference on a larger scale and feel like I’m contributing to bettering the lives of people just like Tristan,” she says. Despite COVID, Ash has been able to host a movie fundraiser and barbecues at local football competitions in Brisbane.
However, it’s her funky socks that have been the real kicker! At the gym Ash works for, they encourage people to wear their best socks, on Funky Sock Friday, and donate money for a charity. Witnessing first hand just how many people love a funky pair of socks, this sparked an idea. “I wanted to create some needle socks that might strike up a conversation at the gym,” she explains. “The more people we can talk to about diabetes, the further we can spread awareness and understanding on a larger scale. So I created some funky blue socks with multi-colour needles, and some white socks with ‘get pricked’ printed on the side for a cheeky statement.”
Ash has also recently launching a new platform. “I started Stripped Supply as a place Gen Z diabetics could discuss the topics that are uncomfortable to talk about,” she says. “The kind of stuff you don’t want to ask your parents or your GP – like sex, dating, body confidence and even mental health.”
Her vision for Stripped Supply (www.stripped.supply), is for it to also become a place that can help automate how someone manages their diabetes. “I think there’s so much more support we can be offering 20-something diabetics, who are navigating how diabetes will fit into their new adult life,” she says. “Big things are coming – that’s all I can say!”
You can purchase a pair of funky diabetes socks from thediabeticsgirlfriend.com/ funky-socks.