Overwhelm

It may not be an obvious connection, but sometimes social anxiety is a side effect of overwhelm, which reduces your tolerance for the uncertainty that comes with social interactions. Situations you normally take in your stride may be daunting when you’re mentally and emotionally stretched to capacity. It can feel self-compassionate to give yourself a break and avoid social interactions if they seem to add to your pressure but, over time, withdrawal can worsen overwhelm by depriving you of social support and an outlet for stress.

It can be a vicious cycle because overwhelm can fuel self-doubt (‘Why can’t I cope? What’s wrong with me?’) and self-doubt can make even low-key socialising feel overwhelming, even with people you enjoy spending time with. If people see you as outgoing or socially confident, you may feel they won’t take your social anxiety seriously, but dealing with this on your own is not the solution. Start by taking a step back to assess your commitments and what you can let go of to create space. Step off the overwhelm treadmill and your capacity for social interaction will have a chance to flourish naturally.