QUOTES of the week

‘The modernisers think of Radio 2 as a comfy old boozer. Out goes the cheery landlord with his tankards and dartboard and in come the baristas, shot glasses and exposed air-conditioning pipes.’

Former BBC music executive Trevor Dann accuses Corporation bosses of ignoring the wishes of listeners.

‘When you married into the Royal Family, we rejoiced in the streets the same as we did when Mandela was freed.’

Reported remark to the Duchess of Sussex, according to her account in a new magazine interview. Mandela’s family later rejected the comparison.

‘I’ve never kissed a Lib Dem. But that’s more to do with statistical likelihood.’

Comic Geoff Norcott hits back after Labour’s Lucy Powell wore a ‘Never Kissed A Tory’ T-shirt.

‘It took me 11 hours and 54 minutes to get that beer.’

Newsreader Sophie Raworth enjoys a welldeserved drink after a 35-mile run across the Alps.

‘I have four teenage children. I have no intention of spending more time with my family.’

Ryanair boss Michael O’Leary shudders at the thought of retirement.

‘I’ve never met anyone I’d walk 500 miles for.’ The Proclaimers star Craig Reid

– whose biggest hit was I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) – gives an honest assessment.

‘Wagwan.’

A South London resident uses the Jamaican slang greeting during an encounter with Boris Johnson. The Prime Minister replied with a polite, ‘How do you do?’

‘Society just accepts that every August bank holiday my colleagues get abused, spat at and sent to hospital.’

Ken Marsh of the Police Federation, after more violence against officers at the Notting Hill Carnival.